Posted by: Rolf | November 8, 2015

Gluttony, Sex and Golf

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It seems that the Chinese Communist Party has outlawed President Obama’s “love for golf” he enjoyed for the last seven years while “putting” up with Republican “opposition” to his dismissal leadership.

China’s Communist Party has “banned” its members from “extravagant eating and drinking”, engaging in “improper sexual relationships with others” and playing “golf,” state media reported.

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The ruling party’s “Political Bureau” adopted new rules on “clean” governance and “discipline” the official Xinhua news agency said, describing the measures as “a moral ethical code that members must abide by”.

Party members were already barred from “keeping paramours and conducting adultery” but the new rule on “sexual activity” was stricter, Xinhua said.

Playing “golf and excessive eating and drinking” were explicitly listed as “violations of discipline” for the first time, it added.

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The “regulations,” which apply to “everyone” in the 88-million-strong Communist Party, also forbid forming “cliques” within the party and “nepotism.”

Since “ascending” to the party leadership in 2012, President Xi Jinping has launched an “austerity” drive and a sweeping “crackdown” on corruption, with thousands of officials “falling from power.”

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But “critics” of the campaign liken it to a political “purge” targeting Xi’s opponents.

Spending on “luxury” goods and dining in “high-end” restaurants has “plummeted” amid the crackdown, with government officials “intimidated” by high-profile corruption “prosecutions.”

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The document did not detail “punishments for violating” the new rules, but the party maintains its own feared “internal disciplinary” system, which operates without “judicial” oversight.

Party “discipline” superseded “criminal” law, Xinhua said.

The Communist Party has long had an “ambivalent” relationship with golf, which is a “lucrative” opportunity for local authorities and a “favored” pastime of some officials, but is also closely associated with “wealth” and Western elites.

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Central authorities ordered a nationwide “moratorium” on new golf courses in 2004, but development “continued” as revenue-minded local officials went their “own” way, even offering “tax breaks” for operators of new courses in places such as Hainan province.

The number of courses in China has “grown” from fewer than 200 at the time of the “ban” to more than 600 this year, according to Xinhua.

 

See you at the first tee…

Chinese Communists Ban Gluttony, Adultery, Moon Cakes, and Golf
China Communist Party’s deadly sins: gluttony, sex and golf

Posted by: Rolf | October 30, 2015

Halloween Golf

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So these “little” guys are what’s “hot” on the Internet right now. Girls are literally “drooling” at the site of cute little “Jordan Spieth” and little “Michael Greller.”

If you’re not “ready” to have kids yet do not “show” those pictures to your “wife or girlfriend” because she will throw you “down” and have her “way with you” until you get her “pregnant.”

I get it. Those kids are “cute.” Everybody can see that. Spieth is the“it” golfer at the moment so kids want to be “like” him and dress “up” for Halloween.

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Congratulation  Jordan. The “trophies” are nice. The millions of “dollars” in the bank are even “nicer” but everybody knows you haven’t “truly” made it until someone dresses up “as you for Halloween.”

Spieth is “now” at that level.

Dressing your kid as “clean cut” Jordan Spieth is all “well and good” and people will love it, but this is how “real” golf fan parents “dress” their kids.

Let’s not forget the “greatest” mini golfer costume of “all” time. The costume that “cannot and will not” be topped ever. That was last “year” and it’s still the “best.”

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Little John Daly.

If you’re gonna “dress” your kid up as a “golfer” make it the most “one-of-a-kind” golfer ever to “grip it and rip it.”

That’s “Halloween” done right.

See you at the first tee…

Posted by: Rolf | October 4, 2015

Diving For Golf Balls

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If you think your job is “hard,” this man dodges alligators for a living.

Glenn Berger’s bizarre but “lucrative” business sees him “dive” down in the water “hazards” off some of Florida’s finest golf courses to find “lost” golf balls.

The 40-year-old “claims” he’s collected 15 million “balls” in a 14 year career to “sell” them for a profit.

Depending on the “type” of ball he could make as “little” as 25 cents or as “much” as $2.

But while Glenn hasn’t disclosed exactly how “wealthy” he is, shipping two million balls a year internationally at those “rates” means he can’t be short of a “bob” or two.

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He said: “It’s a great job. I’ve had a few run-ins with alligators, they’re a hazard in my line of work but it’s all worthwhile.”

“They’ll float over me while I’m on the bottom but sometimes they’re curious – especially the smaller ones, they’ll dive down and bump me on the tank just to see what I am.”

“Scuba diving is a dangerous activity as it is but when you add no visibility, no lifeline and alligators looking for a meal it only gets worse.”

“I just try to not to think about them and focus on picking up golf balls.”

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During the dives 6ft 8ins, 18st Glenn wears a “black and blue” wet suit, weights and an air tank he paints in a “camouflage” pattern to “hide” from any curious gators.

Glenn says that some of his most gut-wrenching “run ins” include an alligator tangled in his “diving” gear, or becoming stuck to “debris” at the bottom of the lakes.

One time he “thought” one of the animals was on his “back,” but when he got out of the water he “realized” it was just his “imagination.”

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Glenn has found all kinds of unusual things under water besides golf balls.

Florida “boasts” more golf courses than any other state in the US, more than 1,250. Glenn, originally from Indiana, has dive “contracts” with about 30 of them.

Glenn said: “South Florida water hazards are like no other in the United States. I’ve seen alligators, venomous cottonmouth snakes, snapping turtles and even crocodiles. It can get tense sometimes.”

In his time he’s found “chairs, tables, umbrellas, bird skulls, dead fish, lawn mowers and golf carts.”

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At his warehouse he “dumps” the day’s harvest into a machine which conveys balls along an “assembly” line where they are bathed with “bleach, water, a DE-greaser and a series of chemicals.”

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After the balls “dry,” he then has to “sort” the balls according to “value” and bags them up in his warehouse to “sell.”

“My personal best is 17,000 balls in a single day,” he said. “It’s a hazard and it’s dangerous sometimes but it’s well worth it.”

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Glenn sells about two million balls a year as part of his unusual business.

Glenn has owned his company, “Bustin Balls,” which sells the “second hand” golf balls for 14 years now and the “quality brands” can fetch up $2 per ball if in “good” condition.

He also claims he “runs” into other dangers while in the lake, finding everything from alligators to abandoned cars.

“The golden rule is to never put your hand inside,” he told Today’s Golfer. “My friend did once and he touched a body.”

 

What a life. Head to the “golf” course, strap on a “scuba” gear, head “butt” an alligator and boom you just “paid” your rent. I guess there are “worse” ways to earn a living.

See you at the first tee…

Posted by: Rolf | September 15, 2015

Golf Road Rage

carhit

Dude takes golf club to his $170,000 Benz after it repeatedly breaks down.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a “common” man on the way back from playing 18 holes, or “freaking” Jack Nicholson, or an “angry” Russian who has had enough with life, the “golf club to the windshield” is one of the more “traditional” ways to deal with “road rage.”

 

I’ve never “done” it because I think “rationally” before I act, but it’s borderline “poetic” taking an iron to something out of “pure” anger.

Getting “cut” off and then arguing “nonsense” with morons on the road is equitable to “hell hath no fury” in any situation.

Anything that happens in a 30 second “blackout” of seeing red can be “defended” in court as temporary “insanity.” So please “excuse” this Russian as he goes “about his business.”

And unless he “solely” plays Par-3’s, that 7-iron is “purely” for smashing windshields. I didn’t see that “club” come out of a “golf” bag. I assume this was “premeditated” road rage.

Timeless.

 

See you on the first tee…

The Classic Road Rage Golf Club To The Window

Posted by: Rolf | August 31, 2015

August Golf News

Golf News 01

Miguel Angel Jimenez can’t stop making “Hole-In-Ones.”

This is his second one in as many weeks, third of the season and 10th all-time on the European Tour which is a new record. I’m convinced he doesn’t hit “hole-in-ones” so he can dance. He does it for the people. He doesn’t care about the rest. He just wants the people to be happy.

What a guy. A natural born showman. The clubhouse has to be electric when he walks in after his round. Buys shots for the whole place, drinks 3 bottles of fine wine to himself while smoking a cigar. He enjoys it all.

Bubba’s first thought when a drone gets brought up? “Let’s see if I can hit one out of the air and drop it.”

Bubba Watson argues with a Rules Official about “ants and burrowing animals”…

See you at the first tee….

Posted by: Rolf | August 30, 2015

Obama Hustled in Golf

Obama Hustled in Golf 01

Be careful, Derek Jeter. Who knows what can happen when you “tick off” a president with a year left in office?

The ex-Yankees shortstop took up golf after hanging up his spikes got to spend a round with President Obama in Nevada last November.

We all thought what “happened” on that golf course would “stay” on that golf course, but POTUS is apparently not “pleased” with the outcome.

While at a “fundraiser” held by Las Vegas Sun owner Brian Greenspun, Obama “complained” about Jeter fooling him into “thinking” the ex-shortstop was “terrible” at golf … and it “cost” the president.

Here’s what Obama said via Politico:

“Greenspun and Derek Jeter stole money from me at Shadow Creek. It was clearly a set up, because when we got to the practice range, he was shanking balls everywhere. I said, ‘You play golf Derek?’ And he said, ‘I just started 2 weeks ago.'”

So Obama took “pity” on the former professional athlete and “spotted” him 30 strokes. You can guess what happened next. Jeter “crushed him.”

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“We had to take a picture of me handing Derek Jeter money at the end of the game.”

Then again, maybe it’s not entirely “surprising” Obama came out on the “losing” side of things. He doesn’t “exactly” have the most “impressive” golf swings.

Don’t be “surprised” to hear some weird “clicking” on your phone the next time you make a “call,” Derek.

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Posted by: Rolf | June 28, 2015

Trash Bin Golf

Trash Can Golf 00

Somehow this guy gets his “head” stuck in a trash can during a “Charity” Golf Outing. How does that happen?

Golfers do some really “dumb” things when they’re having a bad round. They “cuss,” they “slam and break” clubs, they might “jump” in a water hazard to cool off.

Then there’s what 49-year-old British Dave Sayers did.

Sayers, who was “drunk” at a charity golf tournament, decided he wanted to “throw” away his clubs after a bad round. Instead, Sayers, according to The Telegraph, somehow wound up with his “head” stuck in a trash bin.

“We were coming to the end of the day and I had been losing it a bit with a few bad shots. We’d all had a few beers,” Sayers said. “I said, ‘I’m going to bin these clubs’ but they wouldn’t fit. I decided to go a step further. I went to put my head in the bin, but then I couldn’t get it out.”

The 9-handicap player had his head stuck in the “trash” can for about 10 minutes as his wife, Allison, and two children looked on, “laughing” hysterically along with others.

Trash Can Golf 01‘Laying there while “inhaling” the intoxicating scent of “garbage” fumes, a couple of buddies eventually applied enough “Vaseline” so that Sayers head could “slip” back through the opening.

No word on if the “clubs” were still “thrown” in the trash.

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Notice how you don’t see the guy’s “family” anywhere. No “wife or kids” to be found. Nobody “screaming” to get their Dad’s head “unstuck.”

I guess they know Dad “real” well. They can tell when he’s on the “verge” of getting “stick my head in a trash bin” drunk. Once they saw that “look in his eyes,” they took off.

Nothing “good” can happen once Dad gets to that “level.” So Mom “packed” the kid’s into the minivan and “sped” as fast as she could away from the golf course.

Let his “roaring” buddies handle it this time. There’s only “so many times” a person can apply “Vaseline” to their significant others “neck” before it has to end in “divorce.”

She got outta there to “save” the marriage.

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I never once “thought” about sticking my head into a trash can for “any” reason…unless maybe there was a keg of ice cold beer” in there.

This must be the golfing “god’s” punishing him for wearing those “awful” pants.

See you at the first tee…

Charity golfer gets his head stuck in trash bin after getting drunk

Posted by: Rolf | June 2, 2015

Selling His Golf Clubs

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What a “sad” story. A guy being “forced” to sell his golf clubs on Craigslist is the most “heart wrenching” story you’ll ever read.

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You can hear the “pain” in his writing. He absolutely “loves” those clubs! They’re in “great” condition! He barely “used” them! He wants to “sell” them to a single guy so the new “owner” and his clubs don’t ever have to “experience” what he’s going through.

It almost “sounds” like he wants to give the clubs “away for free” because the money he does get for them will go “towards buying my wife more useless shit.”

He sounds absolutely “miserable.” Tim K is living in a “prison.” A women made prison. He’s doing “time!”

Moral of the story: “Next time you get a marriage proposal make sure your future wife loves golf.”

Or let her “watch” this Seinfeld clip 50 times at full “volume” in the kitchen…

 

See you at the first tee…

Posted by: Rolf | May 25, 2015

Golfing with Ida

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Ida Pieracci is a San Jose Country Club legend. She holds the course record with eleven “holes-in-one” and is still regularly “playing” golf today.

But there is something even more “special” about that feat. The golf “enthusiast” is 102-years-old.

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Ida Pieracci is always interested in “improving” her golf swing.

She is given a “key” to the gate and permitted to “let herself in” and play a round or a few holes “whenever” she feels like it, often playing “five” times a week.

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The centenarian makes her “rounds” whenever she is in the “mood.”

Pieracci takes her “clubs and starts swinging.” And it doesn’t matter if she plays “alone or with people,” she’s there for the “love of the game.”

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The San Jose native’s secret to “living a long and happy life” is summed up with the words “being a good kid,” which she matches with a “hearty” chuckle.

Portrait photographer and director Dustin Cohen, who produced a short video documentary on Ida, provided some background on her “incredible” story.

 

He said: “I had been hearing stories about Ida Pieracci from my parents out in San Jose, California for a couple of years.”

“She’s a bit of a legend at their golf course, still out playing regularly at 102 years old, still laughing and cracking jokes with everyone.”

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Equally as amazing is that she has “racked” up 11 holes-in-one just on that course.

“When I finally had the opportunity to meet Ida, I just felt like this was one of those stories that needed to be told.”

Shortly after, the New York City based filmmaker and a cinematographer friend flew to California to “conduct” an interview and “film” Ida in action.

“San Jose Country Club was incredibly helpful and let us set it all up and film on a day the course is normally closed,” said Dustin.

They even gave us a couple of “golf carts” to run around with and film around the course.

“I worked on the piece for a while, trying to keep it pretty short, fun, and sweet,” a nice, easy watch to make people smile.

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“She has such a personality, it was a fun one to make. And you can hear my laughter coming through a couple times in the video, which kind of proves how genuine it all is.”

Despite Ida’s grand old age, the “talented” golfer prefers to “walk” around the course and often plays a “round” by herself.

And, according to Dustin, if she is ever in “need” of a golf buggy she is only required to “call” the clubhouse and “request” a lift.

Dustin said: “She is absolutely adored and revered at the club, truly a living legend.”

They have a “plaque” up in the clubhouse with her photo and all her “holes-in-one” and I believe it’s called the Ida “Pieracci Perpetual Hole-in One.”

 

 

The keys to leading a “fulfilling” life can be seen by such “inspirational” seniors like Tao Porcho-Lynch the 93-year-old yoga instructor or 94-year-old Hy Snell whose “passion” is painting.

 

 

There is a “lot to learn” from our elders, and for some “inside tips” on how to live a “long and meaningful” life, read this sage advice given by folks who have been “alive for over a century.”

See you on the first tee…

Posted by: Rolf | May 21, 2015

Mission Focus

Mission Focus 01

Here are some scriptures that “inflame” my imagination, and continue to “inspire” my devotion to reaching and discipling men for Jesus. I surmise some of your favorites are on here too…

“I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes.” Romans 1:16

“He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. . . . Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows. . . . He was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities.” Isaiah 53:2-5

“For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.” 1 Corinthians 2:2

“Yet when I preach the gospel, I cannot boast, for I am compelled to preach. Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel!” 1 Corinthians 9:16

“But if I say, ‘I will not mention him or speak any more in his name,’ his word is in my heart like a burning fire, shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.” Jeremiah 20:9

“I tell you the truth, unless a man is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.” John 3:3

“If you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. . . . ‘Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.'” Romans 10:9,13

“Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.” Acts 4:12

“You must speak my words to them, whether they listen or fail to listen, for they are rebellious.” Ezekiel 2:7

“I preached that they should repent and turn to God and prove their repentance by their deeds.” Acts 26:20

“My word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.” Jeremiah 55:11

“I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.” Ezekiel 11:19

“They (God’s priests) are to teach my people the difference between the holy and the common and show them how to distinguish between the unclean and the clean.” Ezekiel 44:23

“For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me.” Philippians 1:21-16

“But before all this occurs, there will be a time of great persecution. You will be dragged into synagogues and prisons, and you will be accused before kings and governors of being my followers. This will be your opportunity to tell them about me. So don’t worry about how to answer the charges against you, for I will give you the right words and such wisdom that none of your opponents will be able to reply! Even those closest to you-your parents, brothers, relatives, and friends-will betray you. And some of you will be killed. And everyone will hate you because of your allegiance to me. But not a hair of your head will perish! By standing firm, you will win your souls.” Luke 21:12-19

“And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, ‘Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it. For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.” Mark 8:34-38

What is something you really want to “change” about your life, but haven’t been “able” to? You already know this, but if you could have “made” that change on your own, it would have “happened” by now.

On the other hand, we’ve all watched men’s lives “radically” transformed. We’ve seen it with our “own” eyes! Not much will change for the better “apart” from Jesus, but we also know that we have a “part to play.”

Here are some “practical” daily steps you can take, and where to go from here in this week’s Video Bible Study.

Mission Focus 02

In His Grip and Serving Grace…

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